Typical traits of children with oppositional defiant disorder.
They act younger than they are. Don’t expect them to mature quickly.
They live in the here and now, and can’t think about the past or future. They don’t see how their actions result in a series of consequences. They can learn sometimes, but only if it is pointed out immediately after an incident.
They don’t notice their effect on others. Sometimes you ask others how they feel immediately after an incident, or you gently report how it makes you feel.
Their brain is easily overloaded, and they have a hard time with changes. And yet, you can use this overloading problem to your advantage.
They cannot follow your reasoning, so don’t try.
Defiance may be a strength in their future. With mature skills, they’ll better resist negative things they’ll face in life.
Unrelenting defiance is a true disability that negatively affects a child’s life and future. I’ve seen highly intelligent defiant or ODD diagnosed children experience academic failure or enough suspensions or expulsion to hold them back a grade. This is a can’t-win-for-losing path that really sucks, doesn’t it?